Mystery Solved

LAZENBY CASE COMES TO A DRAMATIC CLOSE AT FUNERAL

Today the funeral for Jeffrey Michael Lazenby was held. The service opened with "Abide With Me" played by Joby Bell, one of Mr. Lazenby's cousins, on the organ. Then after an opening prayer, the Appalachian Wind Ensemble played one of Jeff's favorite hymns, "It Is Well With My Soul".

The message was delivered by several ministers that Jeff had served his Lord under. With the resounding themes of goodness, mercy, sacrifice, and love, they painted a picture of the life of Mr. Lazenby. All in attendance remembered fondly his outgoing and loving personality. There wasn't a dry eye in the huge cathedral as the Appalachian Wind Ensemble played "With Heart and Voice", a song based promently on the hymn "Come Christians Join To Sing", which is also East Burke High School's Alma Mater.

The biggest event of the evening was when a final guest speaker was introduced. Through the back doors walked none other than Jeff Lazenby himself!

Once he reached the pulpit, he delivered the following statement:
"Ladies and Gentlemen. Dear friends. I am obviously not dead. Everything about it was a hoax. I just wanted to know that I was truly loved. Many of you told me, quite often, that you loved me. I wanted to know that it was more than just words. I wanted to know that there was more meaning behind it. Some of you, never really told me. You just assumed I knew. Maybe I did, maybe I didn't. I still like to hear the words.

What kept you from telling me? There was never anything to fear. I would gladly tell you each and every day. I was simply waiting for you to go first, so I would know it was ok for me to. Consider yourself lucky. I'm not really dead. You've gotten yourself another chance. You better take this one, because it may be the last you get"

With that, Mr. Lazenby turned and walked back out of the church. Outside, he spent the rest of the day hearing heartfelt expressions of love and emotion. Of course, being the loving person he is, he responded to them with even greater love.

So now, the case has been closed. I guess the lesson Mr. Lazenby wanted to teach us all was to never assume. Never fear. Always love, and let it be known.

Give and Receive

LAZENBY CASE CONTINUES TO BE SHROUDED IN MYSTERY

This evening at the receiving of friends for Mr. Lazenby, the mystery surrounding his death grew.

Hundreds of Mr. Lazenby's closest friends gathered at Conn Funeral Home this evening to pay their final respects. With the body still having not been found, an empty casket holding some of his most prized possessions was the focus of their grief.

Inside the casket were things Jeff held near and dear to him. Items included: his high school year books, his Drum Major uniforms, his class ring, and his conductor's baton. Appalachian State University has decided to retire his Drum Major uniform in his memory. It will be promentently displayed in the lobby of the new wing of the music building, which will be named in his honor: The Jeffrey Lazenby Conductor's Wing. The School of Music has created a conducting major also in his honor.

Tonight's activities were not without incident. Part of the way through the evening, it was discovered that Mr. Lazenby's conductors baton had been removed from his casket. Tempers flared as the guests searched for the thief. The family is very distressed as now not only is the body missing, but possibly Mr. Lazenby's most prized possession as well.

Tomorrow is the funeral for Mr. Lazenby. Police hope to have either solved the case by then, or else they will close it. We may never find out who murdered Jeffrey Lazenby.

Suspects Come Into Focus

THE SEARCH FOR SUSPECTS IN LAZENBY CASE HAS NARROWED

Through a series of interviews, police have developed and narrowed down the list of suspects for the Lazenby case. Starting will his closest friends and acquaintances, police narrowed down the their list to four.

The first and prime suspect in the case is the late Mr. Lazenby's roommate. In an interview, he revealed his hidden hatred for Jeff and the success he was having in college. A license for a gun was found in his desk drawer. He was one of the last people to see Mr. Lazenby alive.

Another suspect in the case is a friend from high school now attending NC State. In their interview, they were very guarded in revealing any emotion toward Mr. Lazenby. In Boone to congratulate Jeff on his successful drum major audition, things could have turned hostile.

Jeff's closest friend, Taylor has also fallen under suspicion. The two had apparently argued over the outcome of a poker match. There is an significant amount of time around the murder in which Mr. Hutchins was not seen nor has an alibi for.

Another high school friend at ECU has also been interviewed by police as a suspect in the case. No apparent motive for the murder has been found in this person, although their emotion displayed toward Mr. Lazenby was unclear.

Police are continuing their investigation. Meanwhile, the receiving of friends has been scheduled for tomorrow.