Oh What A Beautiful Morning

From the minute I woke up this morning, I could tell that it was going to be a great day. The sun was shining, birds were chirping, and the only clouds in the sky were the white wispy ones. If I was a person who sang in the shower, you better believe I would have today.

My 8 AM class was no trouble at all. I just coasted through it, not expending too much energy or brain power. My 9 AM was the same way. Dr. Robertson was nice again today, which is a blessing in itself. My 10 AM class was quite interesting. Even though it is a psychology class, from what we've been talking about you would think it was a study of illegal drugs. Of course, we're looking at how they affect the brain and the psyche.

Lunch was decent, of course I was really saving up for the dinner tonight. My 12 PM English class as usual wasn't anything difficult. Simply a formality. Horn studio at 1 PM was like normal. Brent played all of Strauss 1, and I was informed that I would be playing the first movement for an upcoming concert. It's so nice to be know these things ahead of time!

Global at 2 was fine. I actually enjoy studying musical forms. Of course, I guess that's part of why I'm a music major. After that, it wasn't long until my first lesson.

So, I took my first step into becoming a real music educator today. I actually gave a french horn lesson to another student. It was very interesting. It did confirm my belief that I'm meant to be a higher level director. I don't think I can handle too many beginning students.

After the lesson, it was time for the Teaching Fellows Executive Council meeting. The meeting itself was fine, it was what came after the meeting that was really neat. We had dinner with the Chancellor. That's right, tonight I dined with the Chancellor of Appalachian State University! Needless to say it was a wonderful meal. I even got to play the piano for him. I got back from the dinner in time to see Who's Line.

So today was actually a good day. Although, it's supposed to start snowing soon. I guess we'll see.

May God keep you (and me) this and every night.

He walks with thee, that angel kind,And gently whispers,"Be resigned:Bear up; bear on, the end shall tell The dear Lord ordereth all things well!"
~Author Unknown

Writer's Block

Have you ever felt like you've written it all? Or maybe you feel like there's no use, that no one reads or cares about what you write. However, maybe there's just too much to write. Then again, maybe you're too afraid to write what you're really thinking. If you're me, then tonight you've got all of these happening at one time. Now that's what I call writer's block!

You sit there and stare at the screen, just waiting for some divine revelation. Nothing's coming. You listen to you're favorite songs, talk to you're favorite people (some of which don't talk back), and watch you're favorite tv show. Still nothing, and it doesn't look like anything is on its way.

Then time just slips by. You find that you've sat there for an hour, or two, maybe three, and this is what you've typed on the page: I like cheese. Well good for you. Apparently you have a fondness for dairy, but what does that have to do with anything. Nothing. A big fat nothing. Just like your writing.

Then all of a sudden it just hits you, and you start writing. Stuff keeps coming, just out of nowhere. It may or may not mean anything, but you don't care. You're able to write again! So what does it matter if you're rambling. So what that there is no profound statements or life changing dialogue. The point is you're writing again. The smart stuff can be written tomorrow. For now, anything will do.

So there's my anything. No profound statements. No life changing observations. No ranting on about my sorry romantic self (don't worry it's coming). No raving about how great and wonderful I am (I'll let other people take care of that). Just writing, plain and simple, and pointless.

Now if you'll excuse me, I'm off to sleep on my pillow I've stuffed with all the feathers from my wings that I've lost. But what is this? Are there new feathers coming in? It's still a little early to tell. Please be gentle with me, my wings are still tender.

May God keep you (and of course me) this and every night!

The pages are still blank, but there is a miraculous feeling of the words being there, written in invisible ink and clamoring to become visible.
~Vladimir Nabakov

What Is It About Mondays?

Oh man....this was certainly Monday.

Of course it was presidents day, my brother was off, my dad was off, was I off. Of course not. I forgot that my 9:00 class was cancelled so I waited for about 20 mins with a couple of other guys until one of us remembered.

My psychology class, although interesting, was quite boring. The subject today was very interesting. It was a lecture on the various psychological effects of popular illegal drugs. So if any of you have any questions, just let me know...

Lunch today was pretty good. At least I got a good meal out of the day.

In English, the biggest waste of time, we got our next assignment. Yea...I just cant wait to get started. (Can you hear the sarcasm?)

Global today felt so very long. I almost fell asleep. I was supposed to practice after it, but I just didn't feel like it. I didn't feel like it because of the big problem of the day....

All day today I have had a terrible headache. It has moved back and forth from side to side all day long. It started out on the left. At lunch it seemed to ease off, but during English it showed up again on the right. I tried everything. I been on Tyelnol, Ibuprofin, and Sudafed all day long. Nothing has worked. It has made me miserable!

The day did get a little better here at the end though. New episodes of Who's Line made me laugh, and CSI was really good tonight. Not to mention it was 90 mins long. Score!

As I go to bed tonight, I still have my headache. But at least it lets me know that my head is still attached. So I'm actually turning in a little early tonight, hoping that when I wake up my head will be fine.

I have noticed that lately I've been a little more negative than usual. I have no idea where it's coming from, but rest assured I will find out. The problem will be fixed, and I will be back to my normal positive self soon...I hope. Either that or I'll just go completely insane.

May God keep you (and me) this and every night.

Even love must pass through loneliness
~Wendell Berry

Another Feather Falls

Man, what a long day! It was youth Sunday at our church. Since yours truly is the Youth Choir Director, piano player, creative director, ect... I was worn out.

At least everything went well. I did very well (no surprise) and so did everyone else. We got quite a few compliments. I like compliments...they feel good....

Of course, I had to return to reality. I had to come back to Boone. I had to be reminded of just how quickly things change.

I guess when a person's angel is no longer needed, their wings start to go. I should have known the day was coming, it's come so many times before. I'm sure it will just hurt a little while longer. Or will this be the one time from which my wings don't grow back? If I'm someone's angel...where's my angel?

Here I am. Still holding out my hand. Only now, my wings are tattered. The shine from my eyes dulled. My smile fading. And my arm very, very, tired....
~JL